WOOHOO! That scene I redid, I sent to Fetu Andi on HL. She saw the original BAD version. She says it's much improved, and she liked the little addition of the smoke from Barukei's nostrils. Whee!
I'm going to go over everything I've written after that scene and slog though the holey rough draft and see what I can do to more convincingly introduce the Evil Twin. I'll definitely keep the argument scene and the following one, where Barukei walks in on Keiki all but completely nude. I think it's important for Hiyo's development (she's becoming more important), and for the development of the tension between Keiki and Barukei. Up to this time, it's been Keiki and I want to show that Barukei's returning Keiki's interest, in spite of that gairi Keiki's required to wear in Barukei's presence as long as Barukei refuses Keiki's service.
I started Adelaide and Marion's novel today. I'm already going to make some changes to it, and I'll probably put up a Blog for them, too. It should be a more interesting blog, too; they aren't wasting time. LOL